These months seemed like a incubation container. Putting 18 people in the incubation of Spain. Will some hang close together for warmth or will some find their own warmth or will others hatch. This sounds like a far fetched analogy but watching my group form as been interesting. Some of us and most of us clung to each other. Others searched for spanish friends...some blossomed in Spanish without knowing it.
I'm in my last days here and I am ready to see family and friends. Though I'm deeply sad to go. Sad to never see this place again or that being a huge possibility. I sit here trying my best to studying my two exams. How I ache to be in the library where once you enter...it could be hours till you step outside. I need that solid or maybe that familiar escape from reality. I feel like I am being split into half. I yearn to be home for Christmas and still get the hang out Christmas without my Mom. Though I also yearn to stay here and maybe alone, apart from my American friends. Every time I talk to someone from the States, they always say how much they miss me and cannot wait till I am home. I listen to them and I yearn for them to say it.
Secretly I wish Spain wasn't a plane ride away. I wish it was a drive, a roadtrip. Though it wouldn't be the same Spain I know now. I remember first getting ready to come here. Someone mentioned it is a lot like the States. Just because they speak Spanish doesn't mean they live like South America. I took that to the file cabinet in my mind. Stored it away and hoped I would see Spain in my own eyes. And then I started to realize they were right...though they weren't as Westernized as South America as become. Their Spanish was different and when (and if) they spoke English it had a British accent to it. Although, I saw and heard their conceptions of the West...and it all comes from our TV shows, movies, and who is our president at the time. They knew of what our prom was...our yellow school buses...our burgers...the music we listen to...and our forefathers, who really aren't as old as we thought.
I'm sure once I get back to the States I'll have this strange form of culture shock. Driving from the airport to my house...noticing the change in landscape and the smell in the air. Being consuming by the noises and the mass amounts of English being spoken. I think hearing English everywhere will be the most shocking.
Right now I apologize for being horrible at texting and calling. I'm going to be completely bad at getting back to people. Don't be a fended if I turn off my phone from the numerous texts and calls.
This might be my last entry though I hope to post another towards the end of the week or the weekend. I will recall on last adventures. Most likely be tearing up while writing the last posting.
I'll surely miss this place...specially my host mom who recently handed me a bar of chocolate to help me study. :] wowzers.
I didn't write about the hike we took last Saturday. So I'll briefly mention it. We took glass cable cars up to the top. The walk down took us app. 3 hours to get down. It was so cold the first 2 hours and more of the hike. On the way back from the hike I asked Anne if she had a good day. She said she had a great day and then asked me. I said it was alright. I think I was phased by how much I'm going to miss these kinds of hikes. Seeing these things almost every other week...I also felt pretty phased by the fact that these group of friends I have share Spain in common with me. We share this experience together. Though when we get to Calvin we will go back to our groups of friends...I hope we stay in immediate contact because I have grown to love each one even if I talk to more than others. We have a bond.
I think this week I'll pray...I'll pray for study breaks...people breaks...life breaks...spanish breaks. For experiences like this to never be forgotten.
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| P.S. This is Nicole...pretty amazing person. |
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